This was supposed to have been a wonderful week for me. I origionally was going to have frock here for a visit…*sigh*

Instead I get the week from Hell.
Let’s list all the things that were screwy this week.

Leading into this week, my dad has been very ill…hasn’t been able to walk hardly at all and is mostly an invalid at this point. In great amounts of pain that send me to the emergency room about every other day. So monday morning..emergency room.

Because of this I’ve missed a few classes. NOT GOOD!

Date on Monday…good.
Tuesday night 1:30am, my car gets repossessed. No warning, no give us our money or else…just picked up and taken. It takes 24 hours to figure out what the hell is going on and figure out how much money it’s going to take to get my van back.

Needless to say, I attended no classes as I spent all morning on the phone. Also, several utilities were coming up I wouldnt have money for because of the van…fun! (heavy sarcasm for those of you who couldn’t tell.)

Wednesday is a blur because I spent it warped and worried as I tried to get ahold of grandparents to see if they could help. I was going to have to pay alot of money in payments and I was terrified that the tow company who had my van would charge me outrageously for storage. Meanwhile Dad is still hurting from something happening in his back on Sunday.

Thursday…Dad gets a friend to pick him up adn take him to the doctor…I have no van at this point. I do have one grandparent who is willing to help…and can’t get in touch with other grandparent. Spend rest of day in worried haze trying to get ahold of the phone number for second grandparents, finally getting it and getting told that they can help. tyttytytytytytytyty…..this means I can get my van back from storage…and I find out that I only have five payments left on my loan…yay.

Dad doesn’t come home…at this point I don’t know where he is and wouldn’t until the next day.

Friday…Dad still hasn’t come home but I don’t really have time to worry because I spend most of the day trying to get my van back…frustrating.

I also get a call near noon, and dad tells me that one of the vertebrae has been comprmised…and that I need to come to the hospital he’s at. I get my van, which had been repowed by the nices sweetest repo guys I have ever had the misfortune to meet. (that really is a compliment)

After getting the van, finally…I picked up the kids from a neightbors and we go up to the hospital, only to find him on a permantant morphine pump. He explains that one of his vertebrae is gone and its neighbor is cracked…and it might be bone cancer…yeah, that’s what I needed to hear, althought I wasn’t surprised.

After this visit we go to a primary activity for the kids at church, my kids showed off their art and talents and I silently cried in the background. They sang I am a Child of God as the closing song…just about did me in. This song makes me cry under good circumstances. I informed our Bishop who was there of my dad’s condition and recieved strength and encouragement from talking to him.

Saturday…I woke up at 6 in the morning…fun. Basically ignored the world that morning…vegging online….eventually leaving my bedroom around 11. I sort of took care of the families needs and then went to see my dad at the hospital. He informed me that they had confirmed that he had cancer nodes in his spine, lungs and liver. The cancer in his spine was eating the vertibrae and we discussed what to do and who to talk to and what time he might have. My dad and I have had a rough relationship. We’ve always been able to talk companionably, I just have not been able to show him any affection. He’s always been understanding because he knows it was caused by my molestation when I was 9 by a family friend. However, because of our ability to talk about things I think he understands how I feel, even if I can’t show it.

My friend Amy took me karaokeing that night and we had a great time. Good sound system at the local she took me too and one patron just loved my voice. Although I was upset when he came up and kissed my temple while I was singing on his way out. Completely took me by surprise, but I’m glad I can take these things in stride and not overreact…pissed me off though. I realize it’s a compliment..but man, a major breach of personal space.

I get home only to find some warm snuggles from my online friends that made me smile. That made me feel good.

So as you see, Hell week with some nice stuff too.

I need a break!

This entry was posted on Sunday, November 9th, 2003 at 2:56 pm and is filed under Life. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.