This was written on one of the profiles from one of the lds sites I’m on. Completely cracked me up and so I just had to share with you guys. Thanks to Jackalope for letting me post it.

Sample lines from girls’ profiles:

18 year old — Everything is like so crazy and awesome oh my gosh I love life it’s so amazing I love to just have fun all the time oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh…I’ll try anything once.

21 year old — I’m finishing up my psychology degree at the U. I know everything and I’m so mature. Oh, and I love to go clubbing and don’t you hate it when guys get all freaky with you on the dance floor? Lame! I’ll try anything once.

24 year old — I’ve been hurt a lot by guys. My mom signed me up for this. Online dating seems so dumb (translation: all you guys are dumb). I’ll try anything once.

28 year old — I’m a professional woman and I expect a lot from a man, but you will have to read my mind because I’m not going to tell you. I’ll try anything once.

31 year old — Well, my 3rd divorce is final. See below for my incredibly unrealistic list of demands. Any man who doesn’t meet 99 percent of my criteria need not apply. And don’t even try it…not even once.

( Hey…they don’t have to meet ALL 99%.)*grins*

34 year old — My doctor told me that I can start socializing again. It’s been over a year since I was released from the hospital. I’ve been working my way back into society. Would you like to be my friend? I’d like to be your friend. I’m very normal and I want to have lots of kids. If we start now, we can have 10 by the time I’m 50. I’ll never leave Utah.
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Tee hee : )

*BONUS SAMPLE GUY’S PROFILE* — I’m an idiot. I think cliched lines are a great way to impress girls. I’m spiritual, unless you’re not, then I’m not either. I served a mission, therefore I am infallible. I want a woman who thinks for herself, but not really. I like to speak in misspelled sentence fragments when I’m on IM and I love to use the abbreviation “LOL”, even though I’m not really laughing out loud. In fact, I’m really COI (crying on inside). Do you like the picture of me with my hat turned sideways? Oh yeah, almost forgot, I like to hike, camp, bike ride, flex my muscles in the mirror every morning, play video games, listen to the music that my peers pressure me to, and wear ironic T-shirts from Hot Topic.

This entry was posted on Friday, July 29th, 2005 at 5:44 pm and is filed under Humor, Life, Stupid Stuff. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.